Friday, 13 November 2009

Man-Bags at Dawn


I'm not feeling the love today, it's the first time in about three weeks that Lucille and I are spending any quality time together due to our work commitments, it's pissing with rain and to top the day off I've got a hangover that will not go away.
I, therefore, feel like having a bit of a rant, about what? well today it's the English language. Lucille described one of my bags as a 'man-bag' to which I replied, it's just a bag, let's not 'over-friends' it, I was referring to the episode of friends(an American sitcom for those without televisions) where Joey gets a 'man-bag' that basically looks like a lady's hand bag, cue lots of handbag gags.
Man-bag is a symptom of the Americanisms that are infecting our daily conversations and even newspaper & broadcast journalism. Now I'm the first to admit that I'm not the greatest at writing and anyone who reads this blog will testify to that but I at least try and keep up with my spelling since my grammar seems to have gone to pot.
I'm going to give you some choice words and phrases that really wind me up, feel free to join in by the way!
I'm going to start with Innit! I've been hearing this word since I was about 13 and I even used to use it, innit? Are we so lazy that we have a word for the question/contraction 'isn't it'? it's already contracted!!! Fuck off you little Oiks!
Secondly I have to say that 'guesstimate' really stabs me through the heart, guess or estimate folks, make your bloody minds up!
I'm only going to do three because I'll be here all day and you'll get bored(if you're not already asleep) so lastly I have to go with 'can you borrow me a tenner'. Er, what? can you say that again? borrow me? I don't want to borrow you, you're clearly uneducated and I don't need your money either.
Now, I know teachers and I know how hard people in education work so I'm trying not to have a go at them but do the students of today realise that they're saying these things? In fact, the 'borrow me' phenomenon I hear from adults, all the time so it's not just todays teachers that seem to have failed, it's probably the teachers who were teaching my generation.
I'm going to sign off now but before I do...spellcheck?
By the way guesstimate is on the spell checker, aarrggghhh!!!

5 comments:

katy said...

'llow it or 'llow me
I have beanded these phraes from my lab using the reason they are not proper English and even gave one cretin a detention for using them too often in the lesson.

katy said...

Ignore the spelling mistakes! I'm tired we had ofsted this week.

Sid Boggle said...

There is a certain beauty in the elasticity of the English language. I suppose its versatility means it can be stretched to the point where certain types of vocabulary ghettoise and label its users, innit? ;-)

I suppose the alternativer would be some kind of rigid Orwellian Newspeak which closes down abstract and conceptual thinking and promotes conformity...

Rabidbarfly said...

Boggle : I'm all for elasticity, the English Language is in a constant state of evolution, which in itself is a good thing. What I oject to is laziness when using the language. Orwellian Newspeak (otherwise known as Queens English) also has it's place too even without promoting conformity, I personally enjoy being about to understand newsreaders!

Sid Boggle said...

doubleplusungood 8-)