Tuesday, 19 January 2010
Marriage, the be-all and end-all
It's 2010..right? Anyway, if it is it means I'm getting married this year. I'm not going to tell you when because you'll all turn up wanting free grub and free booze and I'm a right tight bastard!
We, Lucille and I, took my mum out to lunch the other day at the place where we're having our reception and she asked an interesting question. Now If you didn't know, my mum is a vicar, she sees couples getting married all the time and she always asks this question.
Why, after living together for so long, do Lucille and I feel the need to get married? It was a question that one of Lucille's friends asked too, to my annoyance but why indeed? Was it a knee-jerk reaction on my/our part to getting back together, (we spent a few months apart a while back) Very possibly I thought to myself but why the hell not, I had been wanting to marry Lucille for ages, years even, I'd just never asked because I thought that she was opposed to marriage.
There's a quote from somewhere, and I don't remember where from, that goes like this, in response to girl saying she didn't want to get married...
Honey, every woman'll tell you she doesn't want to get married, until the right man asked her! Probably got that completely wrong but hey it sounds good and I like the notion that even the person most opposed to marriage will say yes if it's the right person asking.
Something happened when we got back together, we were talking about where we thought we went wrong the first time and I said that I felt we weren't going anywhere because she didn't want to get married. She (as far as I remember) completely stamped all over that thought by saying she'd been thinking about it for a while too. Well that got me thinking!
We had basically stopped communicating as a couple and that led to all sorts of shit. So after a couple of months being back together, I decided that during the up coming trip to Venezuela to visit Gilberto, Lucille's Dad and her half-brothers and sister, that I would pop the question, I'd read that The Grand Sabana was beautiful and had lots of romantic little waterfalls in secluded areas and so I started planning.
The Problem with all this planning was that we weren't really left alone long enough for me to pop the question as Gilberto was driving us around everywhere with Anabel(Lucille's half-sister). I was getting daily headaches due to the amount of Spanish that I was listening to and not understanding very much and the general mood at the end of each day was one of exasperation.
I, therefore, was quite glad when we talked about going up to Northern Venezuela to be by ourselves for the last few days of our trip and it actually happened! Alone at last! We found a lovely hotel, some lovely places to eat and I popped the question in my own lame way, no getting down on one knee, no bravado, just me, sitting opposite the love of my life, nervous as hell saying that I'd been think thinking that perhaps we should get married? LAME!! Anyway, Luce got a wee bit flustered and said OK then...then there were big grins, lots of kisses, a few tears(happy ones of course) and me saying, well you'll be wanting this then....producing a ring that was about two sizes too big. Damn! Anyway the deed had been done we packed the ring away to get it re-sized after getting home.
The ring of course was a last minute thing and not exactly Lucille's style but it was a symbol so when it was stolen by Venezuelan Security during the seven or eight times our bags were checked, Lucille was beside herself with anger(Oddly, at herself, although I don't know why). Gave us an excuse to go and buy one that really suited her though, these things have a way of working themselves out.
So we're engaged now, I can't wait to get married, to me the thought of sharing my life with the one person I have truly loved is an exciting prospect, apart we could have achieved anything, so imagine what we could achieve together...
The most stressful part of this is the organising of the wedding, now so far, I have had very little to do in this respect, I have paid for a few things, I have started on my speech, I have picked my best men(I have two because I couldn't choose between my two best friends, brothers I have known since Tim, the elder of the two, and myself were born in the same hospital ward four days apart) but most of the planning has been done by Lucille and I can honestly say that I don't know how she has done this, yes she's been out of work for long periods but seriously? Planning a wedding is massive, no matter how small the wedding.
I'm looking forward though, the wedding is one day in the rest of our lives, one day that I intend to enjoy, I hope the friends and family that come along enjoy it too but it's one day, the real work starts afterwards and I can't wait.
The Picture, I know, is complete cheese for this article but it was taken at my mate Nick's wedding to his lovely wife Louisa and I like it.
One small question, would it be a no-no to get the registrar to say the words live long and prosper?