Wednesday 13 January 2010

Super Botel


I want this, I dream of this, who's going to do this?

We've heard the ideas about super-casinos, we've read and watched superman, Super Girl and Super Ted, we've generally had a super time doing so too. So Super is the word of the day.
Which brings me to the idea I dream about, the Super Pub or Super Botel (see Botel instead of Motel). Anyone else had this dream, i'd be interested to know.
What would be in the 'Super-Pub'? What would be in yours?

Where do we begin? How about the outside, it should be shaped like a massive beer keg/cask/bottle or can (your dream, your preference).
Then you come to the door which you don't even notice because someone's opened it for you and you just breeze on in.
A host of some sort, lets for the sake of argument call them Beer Angels.
The Beer Angels would see you to your seat and give you the beer list which would have every beer you could drink up.....sorry think up. The beer list could take any form you like too, be it on old fashioned tome or as upto date as a palm reader for the techno-geeks, fuck it! the proper geeks could have it in good old comic form!
There would of course bee beer floors, they wold have their own breweries on each floor, each floor would be dedicated to a style of beer, the IPA/Pale Ale floor, for me, would have to be on the top floor(best beers, best views!) Again that's all dependant on your preference.

There would of course have to be an army of staff. You'd need loads behind the bars on each of the beer floors. You'd also need an army of chefs on each floor to cook all the beer and food matching.

Lets not forget the science bit...there would be a team of scientists on site making sure that no matter how much you drank you would have some sort of chemical formula on hand to imbibe to counter the effects of alcohol.

Ok so in case the scientists aren't doing their jobs and drinking and driving generally being a complete no-no there would have to be rooms for people to stay in, of course there would be a free mini-bar in the rooms!

Tickers would be welcome, we'd have a room for them so they didn't scar...sorry scare the customers away.
Politians would be barred - particularly any who are neo-prohibitionist half wits.
Of course it would be so 'super' that we wouldn't have to advertise the venue in any press related nonsense (Daily Fail be damned!!)

For the likes of Boggle there would be a spooge room if there was a beer that the 'spoogers' couldn't find in this enormous gothic-like stone & marble keg.
AND...AND....How about a fictional beer room for those people sad enough to want a pint of Romulan Ale or 'the usual' from the Queen Vic.

I'm running out of thoughts for the time being but I'm going to update this post if I think of anything to add to it.

Suffice to say this Super Botel would be 'the nuts'. If you want to add to any of these ideas then feel free to do so, never know what might happen...

3 comments:

Sid Boggle said...

You need to stop drinking, mate. It's giving you weird dreams... ;-)

rabidbarfly said...

Sorry, too much cheese over christmas...

Thomas Marshall said...

My ideal bar would have a mega yacht infostructure feel ala wooden edges with small viewing point rounded windows on one floor; star trek sliding doors, a video games room with double dragon 2 and old stuff we don't get now, free cash dispensors, an IPA room with IPA contained in a vessel storage facility with container vessel rolling motion.

It would also have a pool table deck, a grande ballroom style furnishing deck, wurlitzer jukeboxes and a live band stage. Also a chill out room for acoustic bands and good vibes. I'd have the IMAX room too for people who want to wath sport.