Thursday, 5 April 2018

Thoughts And Prayers Enough To Clean Lines

Staff at crafty beer emporium The Snake in the Craft have been told by their head office staff to clean
A typical crafty beer
their beer lines by offering thoughts and prayers.

In a desperately corporate bid to save money the beancounters at the Snake in the Craft head office argued that because most crafty brews are cloudy as fuck no-one would notice if the beer was shit or not.

One member of head office, who refused to be named so we called him Bob the Beancounter was quoted as saying "with the rise of cloudy craft beers we believe that thoughts and prayers are a much more effective way of cleaning the lines whilst also being a great way to save money that could be spent better elsewhere in the business, like beer mats or novelty hats"

When asked about the potential for yeast build up and therefore fobbing and beer wastage Bob the Beancounter shook his head wisely and just answered "who doesn't like a head on their beer?" All these Instagramers and their IceMan pours are so out of touch with what's really going on in the beer world! Customers just don't want value for money anymore"

Bob the Beancounter went on to predict that not only was this form of line cleaning going to be the next big thing in the crafty beer world but that it could also revolutionise other vital areas of the business such as staff training, kitchen management and paying suppliers.

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